BUML 2012-1 Round 2 Preview: BUMLers, To Your Stations!

So the Brisbane Ultimate Mixed League (aka BUML) was all set to start last week, but you wouldn’t have known it from looking at your beloved Brisbane Ultimate Blog (aka BUB). However, Round 1 was a washout (and a blessing in disguise to those backing up from the State Championships over the weekend, and the powers that BUML have wisely stuck to the plan of ‘wash out weeks get played in the washout slots’, and so here we are on Round 2 already. Which means we here in the stately Brisbane Ultimate Blog mansion are as usual on top of everything and ready to preview the new season properly.

Sorting out the draw this season seems to have been something like a chicken trying to fart in a zero gravity swimming pool, and we know we don’t have to explain that one to you folks keeping up at home. But suffice to say that a lack of certainty on some teams parts, some adventures in sorting out fields (screw you, University administrations, and well done, BUMLOC, BUDA and Easts Rugby) and as usual day to day life have caused some trouble.

But the good news is that we now have three divisions, which give space for more growth and mean there’s less of those occasional floggings that only some of us enjoy, and only when there’s an appropriate safeword in play.

**Division 1 aka Daddy Bear**
So, Division 1, BUML 2012. Six teams enter, six teams leave. One team forgets its cleats and reenters. So do the other five. They all exit again, come back next week and enter, exit, enter, go back, return, move on, have a small breakdown, reitire, make a comeback, and have another go, before one team wins. As a whole, Division 1 is looking tight. Make sure you check out our poll over there on the left, and we’ll talk about that next week.

>>Dyspnoeics v Pick Up Discs - ER 1
And of course who’s the first team we get to talk about this season? The team we talk about every season, the Dyspnoeics. Damn you drawmaster Fox, damn you to swill! But then again, Mansauce has been reflexively hitting refresh on our website at least a dozen times daily since the Blues were knocked out of the semi-finals last season, so we need to reward all those hits with some sort of mention. Anyway, the once-mighty Dyspnoeics continue their decline, having last won a championship in mid-2009. Good luck to them. On the other hand, maybe the D’s will start the season with a win, as it’ll be tough for the new frankenstein’s monster on the block, the PUD, to pull their various limbs and organs together (Dusty is of course the liver, Briggsy the libido) to play well on night one.
>Our Tip: Dyspnoeics by 4.

>>UQ Lovers v White Lantern - GS 1
Take a look at the UQ roster. Megz, Luke ‘Gympie to the Core’ Bayne, Tomfunkifiedsteve, BW, Connie and Bonnie. Its just the same old tired faces. Why can’t any of them break out, or at least graduate? Yes, they look strong, but that’s mostly plastic surgery (not scourgery) holding them together. UQ’s apparent dominance is of course on the decline, if its lack of a player base is anything to go by. Sure, they’ve got a team in Division 1, but Griffith have three teams, all up and comers, and much better looking and more sexually active. Aw man, we’re coming across a bit down on the Lovers, but they can take it, and they do have Jack Allan, who we’re all in love with, so well done. Speaking of sexually active, the Heroes Ultimate Club UNLEASH THE BEAST in terms of the White Lantern team and the absolute cream of about 400 and something Heroes Club members (except Bev – see below). Giant sized man-thing, indeed.
>Our Tip: UQ Lovers by 2.

>>Ghost Who Walks v Poachers - AS 3A
We don’t know if anyone else is reading the comics page in the Courier Mail these days, but since Paul Ryan came on board, the art has been rocking. Pity the current long and meandering plot makes little sense, mixing together asian gang lords, Mexican wrestlers and big game fishing. At least the last two have some connection to the returned Ghost Who Walks roster, which continues to feature Luke ‘Big Daddy’ AA, Bec ‘Big Mumma’ AA and small animal specialist Justin. Against them … well, its been a couple of years of writing these previews now, and we’re still to come up with something either interesting or funny to say about the Poachers. That’s just how it is.
>Our Tip: GWW by 1.

**Division 2 – Mamma Bear**
Division 2 represents the slowly expanding beer belly of the League. We’ll talk more about them next week, but for now, some brief points.

>>What The Huck v Baby Chimis - AS 3B
A casual look through the roster … yep, all the Whaters are there, TJ, Pieman … What the F**K? Trevor!? Truly, this man’s desire to offer his body to anyone who looks like a chance of winning a League is becoming legendary. The Chimichangas may be long gone, but the Baby Chimis remain. The David Bowie of BUML (next to Geoff of Bermuda’s Freddie Mercury of course) is of course Arrlann Christie (or is that Corey Hart?)
>Our Tip: WTH by 5.

>>Tsunami v Bermuda Triangle - AS 5A
We’ll call this match the chiropractor’s dream, as it will be all about adjustment. After weeks of luxury between the walls and on the boards, can the undercover minions of Erik the Sheltered cope with the wide open spaces and hayfever inducing grass of the outdoor game? And after what seems like years of getting rhubarbed in Division 1, can veterans Bermuda Triangle find their mojo and return to the championship winning form of old?
>Our Tip: Tsunami by 2.

>>Heroes v Agent Orange - GS 2
A blockbuster first round matchup. More about these teams next week.
>Our Tip: Agent Orange by 2.

>>Discheads v Disciples - ER2
Let me tell you, I’m rather sick of disc-related puns for team names. Discheads of course won Division 2 back at the end of 2010, and have been coffee and caking out on that win ever since. The Disciples … yeah, more next week.
>Our Tip: Discheads by 2.

**Division 3 – Baby Bear**
A lot of Division 3 will be played at the Griffith Nathan campus, what with all three Griffith teams (the old old one, the old one, and the new one) being slotted in there while seeking to continue to have mostly home games (in exchange for providing the field and all the setup and reporting duties). That is at least for part of the time, as the University in its wisdom has decided to bump Ultimate from the big AFL oval (which fits three Ultimate fields) over to the rugby field (which only fits two) for about half the Mondays of the year. Bugger. There’s been a lot of talk about the Griffith Club providing over half the growth of BUML – there were something 18 teams at the end of 2009 and 17 at the start of 2010 before Griffith arrived, and now there’s 21. But when will this growth turn into trophies? Competition-wise, this will be the toughest of the League. Unlike the days when they were getting smacked around in Division 2 (or in Mellow Yellow’s storied history, doing well in Division 1), all these teams can imagine themselves winning a medal here, if not a championship trophy! No quarter will be offered, as the glory available will indeed be great.

>>Ultimate Apostles v Griffith Go-Go’s - GU 1
We here in the stately mansion always get a bit twitchy when someone starts using the U word as an adjective rather than a noun. The new look UA are lead by MarcusL. Meanwhile, the Go-Go’s enter their fifth season, and feature the Most Valuable Player in Queensland (at least according to the voters at Northern Regionals … although its always easy to stand out on a dud team).
>Our tip: Griffith Go-Go’s by 4.

>>Mellow Yellow v Griffith Oh Yeahs - GU 2
Mellow Yellow of course will be focusing on regaining their status as non-stop spirit champions, having won five spirit cups in the previous decade. It’ll be a challenge of course, as they’re now in the same Division as the Griffith Go-Go’s, who’ve won it three times in their four seasons together (and that missing one was by 0.1 of a point!) Meanwhile, the Oh Yeahs enter their second year as a unit ready to totally rock the scene with their youth and exhuberance.
>Our Tip: Griffith Oh Yeahs by 2.

>>Griffith Yee Hars v QUTies - GU 3
Its been nearly five years since the golden age of the QUTies, when they won three of four Leagues played in 2006-2007. The winter has been dark, but at least Jangles is long gone. But then last season, stuff started to click again. The QUTies are looking cute for 2012. Meanwhile …. MoTo …. MOTO?!? And flippin’ Jordon Stone? Isn’t that guy like 12 years old or something? On this new Griffith team, the Yee Hars? Whoa.
>Our Tip: QUTies by 5.

Unfortunately for Division 3, they land the extra team and the weekly bye (at least until some other team turns up). Slipped Discs have the night off for this week and are free to use Annerley field 5B for training.

And that’s it. Best of luck to all teams, make sure you sacrifice to the sunshine goddess, and we’ll see you on Monday night.