Up Yer BUML: Seems Like a No-Brainer: Grand Final Preview

Borag Thungg BUML-lets! It is I, JdR the Immaculate, here once again with your final BUML preview for the season. Its been a long hard slog but never let it be said that JdR the Perservering didn’t do his best to post something most weeks (finals excepted – new job and all).

Tonight is the night, when the best of the best in spectating terms get to sit around, eat pizza, and watch the hammer-drunk survivors of BUML Season 1-2011 duke it out for Finals glory.

By the Rosette of Sirius which sits upon my brow, the thrill-power generated by these two games is likely to hit leg-liquifying, face-melting levels, so make sure you wrap up warm, bring your chair and check out our preview below.

Division 2: The Ghost Who Walks vs Agent Orange – Griffith 1

Purple verses Orange would probably make for the lairiest Ultimate final seen in Brisbane for many many years, if not ever, as our city has traditionally been somewhat conservative in Ultimate shirt colours (at least until the Heroes took on green and the floodgates opened).

The Ghost Who Walks have certainly had a great season, with only a single loss that we’re aware of, to Minor Premiers Tsunami. They easily rolled the exam-effected QUTies in their quarter-final, and a fast-finishing What the Huck in their Semi.

The Purples have a strong line-up that makes best use of the team’s diverse skill sets, with a very strong zone-defence and gut busting female cutting on offence.

TGWW also have the wood on AO, defeating them 14-11 and 17-9 in their two matchups, both of which were middle of the season.

Agent Orange meanwhile are best described as battle-hardened, and certainly come into the Finals as both underdogs (coming into the Finals in 6th position with 5 wins and 5 losses) and the form team of the Finals, with good wins against quality opposition in the quarter final against the Baby Chims and a mighty one in the Semis against Tsunami.

Can the Nipples shut down the Justin and Joe show? Will Bevan show up? What will Vanessa and Alana show off? We’d also better mention Gavin. I, JdR the Showy-offy, will have trouble not putting both eyeballs onto this game.

Division 1: Dyspnoeics vs Wuxi Finger Hold – Griffith 2

But then there’s this other game – worth at least one eyeball also, if not two or more if you have them. Both of these teams are very very talented and are likely to deliver some entertaining play.

Mansauce the Astrologically-inclined has already called it for his team, noting wins for all his other teams (Queensland Reds, NQ Cowboys, Brisbane Lions) over the weekend suggesting some sort of cosmic alignment, no doubt filtered through Andy L’s red nut.

Wuxi meanwhile we have little to say about, with their media death-star refusing all requests for comment and we here at the Brisbane Ultimate Blog finding it necessary not to talk about them anyway - the release of power should there ever be a confrontation could well end life on earth if we know it!

Looking at what really counts, we see that the D’s defeated Wuxi in a close one (10-8) a few months back in their only meeting for the season. Wuxi defeated the tough Poachers in their Semi, while the Dypnoeics ended the Heroes season last week.

Wuxi are well known for dominating once they get a roll on, and it’ll be up to the Blues to stop this from happening. Props to big daddy Baker, whom we can't help but mention.

Splundig Vur Thrigg!

See you tonight, and again next season.

Congratulations to those who recognised the titles for each of our weekly previews as being drawn from episodes of Survivor: Redemption Island. Let’s hope for a more climactic final set of games tonight!

Thanks also to those who have enjoyed the ongoing theft of lines and concepts from the Mighty Tharg, god-editor of the greatest comics anthology in the galaxy, 2000AD. Splundig Vur Thrigg!

Agent Orange & Dyspnoeics Advance

Dyspnoeics have marched into the Grand Final with a convincing 16 - 8 win over Heroes at UQ tonight.

In Div 2, Agent Orange got out to an 8-3 lead but took the half 9-7. They won by 2 or 3 points over Tsunami in what was likely the game of the season for Div 2. One man got quite horizontal. Guess who?

Results from the other grounds are still unavailable. All will be revealed when Michael or some other source leaves a comment on this post!

Who Will Win Div 2?

Well kids, with the ever-ambitious and fidgety JdR no longer confined to the Pool Room, he has been able to sit behind the type-writter and bang out his usual rhetoric. To show that the Emperor is not entirely reliant on his speech-writers, dstrel will announce some dribble in a feeble attempt to make up for the poor form that resulted in a very low-key Quarter Finals lead-up, which has been blamed for lower than usual turnouts last Monday night.

Indeed, it has begun.

Tsunami

Despite an inauspicious start to the season due to world events, this brand-spankin' new team has been an unstoppable force, demolishing all that have stood in their way - bar Chimis. A close one last week against 10th place Oh Yeahs warrants the question - are they unstoppable?

Ghost Who Walks

Like their Phantomic leader, these acid-loving maniacs boast no super-natural powers, but excel in strength and wit. If there was something super-natural about their performance, it would be the ability to get away with murder. These guys wrote the manual called "How to dominate Div 2 when you have a 7' tall man, high-release throws and girls who like to run" - aka "How to play to your strengths".

What The Huck?

Indeed. TJ has young, sporty, fit friends, so the label "Cougars" was never really suitable. Possibly the best dressed team in the league and now the best named, WTH are going to have to dig deep, as their losses this season came at the hands of the three remaining teams.

Agent Orange

These Smooth Criminals-turned Goverment Spies have managed to snatch a semi-finals birth from the grasp of a higher ranked team. Captain Gavin Croft claims the win over Chimi's was "Like stealing candy from a Baby"* - swift and relentless. Will this team produce enough noxious gas to cause wide-spread damage well into the future?

Stay Tuned for Div 1 Hype!!

*Gav made no such comment nor was he cocky in victory. Not very cocky, anyway.